Rules and boundaries are an integral part of family life. Parents learn the limits of what is acceptable to them when they collide with their children's desires and needs. Jesper Juul calls it a gift that adults get from children. Thanks to this, they can find out what is important to them and learn how to build good relationships.

The process of getting to know and adequately communicating one's own boundaries may take many years. However, it is a two-way process because the boundaries that children draw around them are equally important. The language in which they do so is not always easy to read, so parents need to understand and respect children's messages properly if they want their own boundaries to be respected as well.
Mutual learning to set and communicate boundaries requires an authentic relationship in which adults speak openly about their needs, but also leave space for the desires and needs of the child. Parental responsibility is also important to ensure that this two-way learning process does not turn into a series of destructive conflicts.